In the Beginning...

For as long as I can remember, I wanted to move away from "Nineveh" and live somewhere else. As early as 3rd grade, I used to daydream about living in another city, another state. Before the internet, we actually had to get our factual information from books - what a novel idea! Anyway, we were fortunate enough to have a set of encyclopedias at our house. I can remember looking up various places and reading about them in the encyclopedia. I began to plot and plan my escape then.

Enter reality. Every time I have tried to move away, God has SLAMMED the door shut. He has been gracious enough to let me travel to a lot of states and even go to college for a year in California on an exchange program. But, when I have tried to move away to another state, something major has happened every time.

I am very thankful that God did allow me to live about an hour outside of "Nineveh" for 16 years. What a difference an hour can make!

Anyway, I don't really know why living in "Nineveh" is so hard for me. But it is! We have lived here nearly 5 years now, and I still struggle. Maybe it's the small town mentality - only "Nineveh" has grown by leaps and bounds. Maybe it's the lack of things to do & places to go - only "Nineveh" is surrounded by larger cities with lots to do. Maybe it's flashbacks to high school where bored kids used their vivid imaginations to create rumors for excitement & I want my children to avoid that - only that happens everywhere. Maybe it's pride because I said I would never live here again - only it's not about me; it's about God. Honestly at this point, I don't really have an answer.

Enter trust. God is calling me to trust Him with all of my heart, especially when I don't understand. I have struggled with trust for most of my life. Just recently, God has connected some of the dots for me and revealed that my struggle to trust others (& ultimately Him) began right here in "Nineveh" when I was a teenager. Maybe one of the reasons God has brought me back here is so He and I can tackle this issue and pull it out by the roots from the exact spot it was planted all those years ago. What a mighty God we serve!!!